dear friends,

I made three phone calls today descending in order of importance.

The first call I made was to Karissa. I can't believe she's liked me for the past week. I know she hasn't the past few days. I've spent my time lately looking out for myself and being an inconsiderate, selfish brat and it's not who I am. At all.
I'm sorry Karissa. I've been giving Ryan all my time and I've been blowing you off so I can get the D. I've been the kind of friend that no one likes, and you've deserved a better roommate. But more importantly, I thought for one second it would be okay for me to talk to Carter. Even though you said it was okay and that you guys never officially talked, I should've known it wasn't a question to ever ask. I was so caught up in the attention he gave me that I didn't even take a minute to realize how awful the situation was.

The second call I made was to Ryan. I know I've been the worst to him. What I did isn't even forgivable, but I know he'll forgive me and talk to me like an old friend and come over to hang out when invited. But that isn't the point at all. It's the fact that I acted the way I did to you without hesitation.
I'm sorry Ryan. I made it known to you from the beginning that I wasn't looking for a relationship, but that doesn't make what I did okay. Despite my intentions, I still led you on to believe that it could be in our future soon when I knew it wouldn't be. And it has nothing to do with you. I know it's so cliche to say it's not you, it's me, but it is. God, you were so sweet to me. I was just a bitch, and I'm so sincerely sorry Ryan, really.

The third call I made was to Carter. I can't believe I even thought for any period of time that 'hanging out' with you would be acceptable.
I'm sorry Carter, that I'm not sorry. You are slightly repulsive and not someone I want to affiliate with in any sort of romantic fashion. When I see you next I'll act as though you're a friend and pretend like this whole situation never happened. But really, how dare you try to make out with my face after I arrived at the party with Ryan and spent the entire night trying to get you to hook up with Karissa. Really?